Home » Fiction Series » Oga Martins & His Kettle of Fishes 4.0 – Episode 2
Oga Martins & His Kettle of Fishes 4.0 - Season's Finale

Oga Martins & His Kettle of Fishes 4.0 – Episode 2

They say life is not a bed of roses, albeit I will say it is a garden of weeds and thorns growing on beds of roses. You’ve got to clear out the weeds and thorns to get a view of the beds of pretty roses, and how each individual goes about it is what determines our fate. Some don’t even bother to clear out the weeds and thorns, they just go on a mission to nowhere. 

Oga Martins had a new lease of life under bizarre circumstances after over a decade of brouhaha. He had ended his relationship with his longstanding friend who had become a brother, when his confessions to the Nigerian Police Force and his testimony during Deji’s trial sent him to jail. Deji was meant to spend 25 years in jail, but he was a guest in Kirikiri Maximum Prisons for only 4 years.

Though Martins felt very uncomfortable and terrified at his ex-room mate’s sudden return from prison, what he was oblivious of was that Deji’s life was in danger!

Things were not looking so rosy at Martins’place of work. The Economic Recession that was taking its toll on the Nigerian populace was gradually rearing its ugly head on the management of Realty Point Ltd. The MD was hot on everyone’s heels, especially those heading very strategic departments. Martins was at the forefront of those at the receiving end of the MD’s stern admonitions. It was the first time Martins witnessed the gentleman blow a fuse. Who wouldn’t in these hard times?

In fact his Job description had gone under intense scrutiny. He had been put on the hot seat the whole of the outgoing week, he even had to do a presentation before the board of directors on how to improve sales in the company and he had faltered badly. They say success has many fathers but failure is an orphan, Martins was gradually losing his golden boy statues in the company.

Sales had dropped badly while he was away, and many had attributed the decline to his absence. Now, it was more than 3 months he resumed work, yet there was no improvement whatsoever. In fact, the only person making sales for the company at the moment was Thelma, the youngest employee in Realty Point who had been transferred from the customer service unit to marketing due to her giant strides in the marketing of her company’s properties and young but intelligent Yahne took her place in the customer service unit after a torrid but short-lived time as a marketer.


It was a Monday, Martins was having a meeting with marketers; “The ball is in our court to conjure the winds of change on to this company. Things aren’t looking so good”

“But Oga martins we are marketers not sorcerers” Yetunde, the hilarious head of marketing tried to make light of the situation

“Yetunde I really don’t get you. Who said anything  about sorcery?” Martins countered.

“You did sir, You just told us to start conjuring winds to the company, I just hope our foundation will be able to withstand it when the winds we conjure become a hurricane” Fidelis echoed Yetunde’s thoughts.

“Are you guys kidding me? Is this a strategy meeting or a comedy session?”

“Haba Oga Martins, it’s just to lighten the mood here now, this place has been on fire since the commencement of this meeting. It’s just like we’ve been mourning the death of a loved one” Yetunde added.

“Yes madam, we are mourning…mourning the death of sales. It has never been this bad”

Oga, you no longer know a joke when you hear one? Remember, you are always making us laugh at Monday meetings. Now we are trying to give you a dose of your own medicine and you are blowing a fuse. The handsome Fidelis tried to salvage the situation

“Fidelis just shut that trap!” Martins was furious. He wondered why his colleagues still thought he was in any mood for jokes. It appeared he had overindulged them.”Look guys, play time is over, its time to work.  Excluding Thelma, anyone who doesn’t make sales this month will be booted out. Understand? You can joke away your lives for all I care, but please sell land. That is your main JD here, or else you all will have to get yourself another job. Good day.” Martins left the meeting room angrily.

“Wetin do am? Abi that him troublesome wife fight am before he comot for house again” Fidelis asked.

“He’s under pressure guys. He’s not been performing and is job is on the line. This is probably the aftermath of last week’s meeting with the MD, and his mediocre presentation to the board of Directors on how to improve sales.” Thelma lent her voice.


On getting to his office, Martins replayed the whole incident at the meeting in his head. He had never before spoken to his marketers the manner he did, he just couldn’t understand why a head of marketing who hadn’t sold a plot of land in almost 2 months would decide to joke about the company’s dwindling fortunes during a strategy meeting on a Monday. “If  I were the MD I would have sacked her”, he fumed. “And her crew members knowing my predicament, chose that time to play ball or is there a gang up somewhere?” he wondered.

Martins missed the impact of young Yahne in their marketing meetings. “That girl always comes up with bright ideas though she hardly sold.” That part of her Martins didn’t understand. His phone rang on his desk. “Chai! Mr. Okafor! it’s too early now. Martins had told Mr. Okafor he still needed time to think about resuming the role of property manager of his residential rental property following Deji’s sudden appearance in the building.

Deji’s association with the troublesome and dubious Jamiu was bound to compound his woes. He had decided it was better he stepped down finally. He had too much drama in his life already. His phone’s loud ringtone reverbrated in his office, disrupting his mind games. He finally answered his call. “Hello sir…” Martins words trailed as his attention switched from the phone call to the mean looking intruder that had gained entrance into his office without knocking. Behind the intruder was a protestant from the customer service unit who had followed him upstairs

“Please sir , you can’t enter that office without prior express permission,” Yahne pleaded.

“Will you keep shut there lest I shut you up for life.” The intruders harsh reply rooted Yahne to the spot.

“I wasn’t expecting a guest sir”

“Good day Martins, I am Solonzo,”he stretched out his hands for a handshake which Martins rebuffed. “Never mind, but I think you have something that belongs to me and I want it back!”

Martins was awestruck! He wondered what that thing might be. He had never met the dude before, not even in his dreams.


Oga Martins & His Kettle of Fishes continues next week…

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